Okay. As I mentioned some time ago, my last couple of eye exams showed weak spots in my retina ("lattices," which makes me think of pastry instead of gardening, and in fact gives a whole new meaning to the expression "pie-eyed," but I digress.) This time there was an actual hole, which was obviously a cause for concern, so I was referred to an ophthalmologist for laser corrective treatment. This wasn't LASIK, and my vision was not affected, but it was necessary to sort of... weld everything back in place.

I saw the ophthalmologist a few weeks ago and because I was not seeing flashes or floaters he remarked that in a less myopic person they might not do anything yet, but since myopia plus retinal lattices/holes can add to the risk of a detached retina he wanted to do the procedure soon. When he put it that way I was in total agreement. Actually, since there is no prep and no particular aftercare, he would have done one eye that same afternoon, but I'd had a long wait and the waiting room was still packed and I had no one to escort me home and, okay, I wanted to go to Gloryhound's first Pogue Fado show that night... I ended up declining and making an appointment for a day during my second week of vacation when latsyrk could come with me and make sure I got on the right bus to go home.

And then the doctor got called out of town all that week, so I had to reschedule for yesterday.

Which brings us up to date.

The appointment was for three PM and when I got there it was clear the office was trying to clear the backlog from the missing week. It was wall-to-wall people, and I am sure latsyrk, who is quite a bit younger than I am, thought she had stumbled into God's waiting room. (I think I was the second-youngest person there, which was weird. Age is hell on your eyeballs.) Anyway, I got the dilating eye drops and waited.

For over three hours.

But there were people there who waited for five hours just to have a five-minute recheck on something, and some of them looked like they didn't have much time to waste, if you know what I mean. It was sort of like when you're on a bus in a snowstorm and it takes four hours to get home and by the end of it you're all a community of annoyance and exhaustion and, eventually, giddiness. I think latsyrk ended up trading recipes or something with several people while I went in for my procedure.


Having already had the dilating drops, I then had anesthetic drops squirted into my eyes, which froze my lids as well as the eyeball. I then sat at a machine that looks very much like the one at your optometrist's office, the one where you put your chin on the pad and lean your forehead into the brace at the top so he or she can look into your eyes. The ophthalmologist then put a lens over my right eyeball to hold the lids out of the way and concentrate the beam. It looked a little like a jeweller's eye loupe.

The laser was built into the front of the machine, in the place of the light usually used to examine the back of the eyeball. When it went into action there was a series of soft clicks, each accompanied by a burst of green light (now I'm thinking of Harry Potter and rather glad I didn't at the time.) It was mostly not very painful, although when the spot being treated was on or near a nerve that was a sharp little stinging, and depending on where the light was being used things turned bright pink. It's also always unnerving to be able to see the back of your eyeball lit up and reflected in glass. Ew.

I would class the experience as moderately unpleasant, but really only because there was a lot of "involvement" so the lasering went on for more than a couple of minutes. When we were done my eye was tearing freely and everything looked pink, although that went away pretty quickly. After I'd had ten minutes or so to recover, and had been assured the effects would be pretty much gone by morning, I agreed to have the left eye done immediately. Factored into my decision was the fact I DID NOT want to spend another afternoon sitting in the waiting room twiddling my thumbs. September, especially early September, is insanely busy here at the library and I just didn't need to have a whole afternoon where I was unavailable to teach or work the desk.

The left eye was less involved but it actually hurt worse--not that it was all that seriously painful, but really, a sharp stinging sensation at the back of your eyeball is not a lot of fun. The flashing lights would probably bother some people worse than the pain, but fortunately I've never had much of a problem with that.

I was told everything looked fine but if I started to get floaters or flashes (which, you recall, I haven't had yet so that would be cause for worry) to call immediately.

At which point I was free to leave.

latsyrk's husband had gotten home from work before I ever went in for the procedure, and he offered to come pick us up. Which was really nice of him since it was raining pretty hard by then (however! Dim and grey is good when your pupils are the size of wagon wheels!) and since we were all hungry we went for pizza. They pretended not to notice the way my eyes kept tearing--I probably should have gone straight home to bed but I was hungry, and the pizza was really good. I was in bed by eight-thirty, on the principle that if I can't read I might as well be asleep.

Today things are more or less fine, although I perceive I am a little prone to eyestrain and that may mean I'll be going home early in spite of a desk shift this afternoon. It's dead quiet in terms of reference questions right now so I don't imagine it'll be a big problem. I was mostly concerned with the class I'm teaching in an hour or so. That, I couldn't hand off or reschedule.

Anyway, all done, not too bad as these things go, and now I fully understand why it's such a bad idea to direct a laser pointer at anyone's eyes.

I assume I'll be fine to go see Mitzi tonight. I'll just have to bypass the section of street where the water main broke and tore up the road.

But that's another story.