I've made some progress on the new mystery. I've decided to write each new chunk as a separate chapter and worry about possible linking sections later. I may end up not needing them. I've fiddled with the end of the first chapter a little bit so this one does follow reasonably well. I should be ready to kill someone soon!

( Chapter two, second Kowalski story )

It's the day after Adrian's death, and Kowalski has returned to the festival grounds. Jordy goes off by himself to clear his head, and runs into the detectives.

( Jordy's second interview with the detectives. )

I wondered for a minute whether I should set these excerpts to "friends only." Then I thought about the likelihood of anyone wanting to steal this crap...

As I said in the previous post, I'm trying to rid the Kowalski mystery of passages that serve only to amuse me. This includes scenes in which characters interact for no good story-related purpose. (By chapter seven, we know what the relationships between the major characters are. If we don't by then, it's probably too late.)

However, I'm pretty sure I need to keep this passage in some form, because I definitely want to draw the reader's attention to Erica's last remaining old band mate, Caleb. Most readers will be way ahead of the characters at this point, but just in case... I've mentioned before that I prefer to write mysteries in which the characters, and to some extent readers, are affected by the murders. This passage is a bit of me making sure we haven't forgotten who Caleb is.

My problem here is not so much the fact of the conversation, but the content. I'm not sure it works--the Nana Mouskouri bit may be one of those passages that amuses me at the expense of the story, and the only reason for them to specifically talk about Jordy is to immobilize Jordy as an eavesdropper. And also to focus Jordy on his own relationship with Caleb, which will become important about ten pages from here. Even so, I'm a little uncomfortable with the content because having everyone talk about your main character is kind of diagnostic in most Mary Sue Litmus Tests, and I suddenly don't trust myself.

So: this is a case in which a self-indulgent passage is going to be kept in some form, but the actual content may change when I think of a better topic of conversation for Erica and Caleb. I may have to resurrect the abandoned story about the old band, the bike, and the bag of ducks...

( Excerpt from the morning after the wake and the phone call )

Another couple of Kowalski excerpts.

The first one is long--in our last excerpt, Adrian had been found dead. Now the detectives are conducting interviews. Jordy is the first up.

( The cops know a weak link when they see one. )

This chapter is partly from Jordy's point of view, partly from the cops'. I do that a couple of times throughout the story--I have to decide if it works.

There are interviews with Erica and Gareth in this bit but I thought I'd include the interview with Caleb, which is much shorter. It functions partly to get this character onstage by himself.

( Detectives' Interview with Caleb )

Obviously they are in rough condition still--and yeah, probably too talky even for the format--but I'm pretty happy with how it's coming together.

Another excerpt from the Kowalski mystery:

Adrian, Erica's ex-boyfriend and ex-bandmate, has borrowed Gareth's VW camper and disappeared. Jordy seems to be the only one who doesn't think it's a prank.

( Chapter Four excerpt )

I don't know how much this chapter has changed since the original NaNo draft, but since I had the flash drive at work today I thought I would post the first half of the second chapter. In it, we meet a new friend (although Jordy's not real sure at first) and Jordy and Gareth discuss the "accidental" death of a couple of friends, as well as some stuff that later worries Jordy.

( And this is several pages long, so behind the cut it goes! )

The first bit of the Kowalski story is here.

(This is taking too long to get underway, so any suggestions for tightening it are welcome!)

( The second bit is here. )

I'm trying to transcribe the latest Kowalski draft, and I decided to post a bit of chapter one.

( A fragment that's really very similar to the original. )