(I probably need to create a tag just for that one idea, since this seems to be where I'm keeping all my notes.)

So last night on the treadmill I was thinking about this idea again. (It's the kind of thing I let myself think about a little bit and then I leave alone so as not to wear it out or derail the story I'm really writing.) I think I've decided that, if I include the spacey kid character as the stallion owner's helper (don't worry, when I add the new tag to all the relevant entries you'll be able to look it up if you need to)--anyway, if I do add him to the mix, he can be the ex-wife's son and the stallion owner's stepson, and as far as their horsey friends are concerned the fact he still lives with his stepfather about half the time is simply further evidence that, while the two exes hate each other, it's more recreational than real. Like, they are one another's arch-nemesis, but everybody they know thinks they're only about half-serious. When Ronnie gets killed off, none of the ex-couple's horsey friends believes Mary Lou did it, because with Ronnie gone who will she fight with?

As I say, I'm sort of hanging on to this one in case I ever decide to really write it. You never know, once I'm finished with Kowalski, this one could be an actual publishable story!

If I was to do the Inundation of Appaloosas story for real (and one day, maybe I will) the harmless space cadet character could easily be the kid who helps the stallion owner around the barn. Only, unfortunately, I would probably be forced to kill him off because he would almost certainly do something stupid that the killer couldn't put up with.

I say this, and yet I notice that the lead in my current mystery was intended as Victim #2 in a story I never ended up writing, because I got attached to him and just couldn't kill him off. So you might want to place your bets now on whether, if I ever get this story off the ground and include the character, he'll actually come to a grisly end.

The stallion owner fondly inspired by Ronnie Hawkins? Alas, he's toast.

I mentioned a week or so ago that I was getting a book out of the library and wondered if I could focus on the large print format. The print turned out to be fine, the problem was, alas, that I just didn't care for anyone in the book. There are books that in theory should work for me and just turn out to be blah, and this was one of them. And there were even quarter horses!

Okay, one of the things that amused me about the story was the name of the main character's yearling colt: Peppy Leo (which you'd think has been used by now) in honour of his great-great-grandsire Mr San Peppy and his whatever-grandsire Leo San. On the one hand, it demonstrates a knowledge of the bloodlines she's writing about. On the other, I find it absolutely hilarious when breeders dig eight generations back for a famous ancestor to name the horse after.

The thing most worth noting about this story is that it uses the artificial-insemination-fraud plotline I suggested for my inundation of Appaloosas idea. (What's really funny is that none of the horse breeder characters seem to be able to discuss the details of AI or breeding or use the word "stud," let alone "semen." I don't know about you, but the horse people I know are not nearly so prim!)

However, the idea of the nasty joke which turns out not to be at the heart of the mystery is still up for grabs. Dibs!

I can't see anyone bumping you off for providing them with this:



Or this:



Although admittedly, it'd be less of a shock if you started out with this:

Okay, a while ago I posted about a nebulous idea I had for a story in which an unscrupulous stallion owner whose champion stallion is infertile substitutes an Appaloosa, with colourful results for mare owners. Discussion ensued--more than I planned on, for sure, because it was strictly at the hee-that-would-be-hilarious stage and had not yet risen to the level of an actual plot.

However. The discussion pointed up some areas of weakness in the initial idea that I'd have thought about if I'd taken it a step further. And after the discussion I actually did think about it a little more seriously than I'd bothered to previously.

What's the point of the inundation of Appaloosas? Just that--the spotty baby horses showing up where they're not expected. The unexpected Appaloosa arrivals struck me as the sort of event that would be funny as hell--if it happened to some other mare owner. (In my case, of course, any arrivals of Appaloosas would be fervently hoped-for.) The story is a murder mystery, but I actually planned to think up some other motive for the murder: the foal scam is just how the perspective characters get involved. The stallion owner was going to have given plenty of other people reason to be much angrier at him.

When I got thinking about it, though, the thing I was left with was, I liked the idea because it struck me as a good joke.

And there we have it: it's got to be a joke. An elaborate, somewhat nasty joke.

Ta-da!

So: the stallion owner (who in my mind is starting to resemble Ronnie Hawkins) is fairly recently divorced and doesn't get along with his ex. He's got a malicious sense of humour but is basically not a bad guy. The ex-wife is a little tightly wound, but also basically all right. The local horse community is elaborately tactful because it's a small one and nobody wants to get in the middle of a fight.

The main character is a young woman who teaches some lessons at a local barn, where she used to keep her Appaloosa gelding, Willie. Willie died of colic a few months ago so she's between horses, and the barn owner lets her ride her youngsters. (For convenience we'll call the stallion owner Ronnie, his ex-wife Mary Lou, the main character Julie, and the barn owner Charlene.)

In the divorce Ronnie and Mary Lou each kept the horses who were registered in their names--she has a couple of thoroughbred broodmares and her jumper, and he has his quarter horse gelding he rides in team penning. But they also owned a young stallion in common, and the horse is pretty much Ronnie's pet. So the deal was that he retained physical custody of the stud but she could breed to him.

While all this was being worked out, Ronnie was diagnosed with lung cancer, and his outlook wasn't good.

Because he and Mary Lou can hardly be in the same room together, they agree the first breedings of her mares will be via transported semen. (I need to check on whether the Canadian Sport Horse Association will register foals conceived in this way. I know the Jockey Club won't, and the AQHA will, so if CSHA demands live on-site cover or I can't find the info I'll just have Mary Lou breeding appendix quarter horses.)

Julie and Charlene get involved when Ronnie talks Charlene into a test breeding with her QH mare, Calista. Charlene is an old friend of Ronnie's and although she points out that she's not interested in a great big ol' English-type horse, she finally goes along with him. She knows Mary Lou well and has some sympathy with Ronnie's explanation that he just wants to make sure everything goes well so he won't need to deal with Mary Lou any more than is necessary this breeding season. He's philosophical about "kicking the bucket" but there's some aggravation he says he doesn't need.

So after Calista is confirmed in foal, Mary Lou's mares are bred. Calista foals first. Julie, the App fancier, is present at the birth and thinks the leopard baby is wonderful, just a dream foal. Charlene's first comment is, "The old bastard!"

The next morning Charlene heads over to confront Ronnie (Julie is tagging along because this is too good to miss) and that's when they meet the App stud he has stashed. They both recognize him on sight:

Charlene: "That's the few-spot stud Linda Robinson used to ride in the pennings! He always throws a ton of colour! The old bastard was counting on it!"
Julie: "I always did like that horse."
Charlene: "Well, I know where you can get a good deal on one of his babies! And the old bastard must have known I'd offer the foal to you!"
Julie: "I could name him Waylon..."

By this time Ronnie is not in very good shape but he's delighted with his joke and the anticipation of Mary Lou's reaction. He points out that once he's kicked the bucket, Mary Lou will have the original stallion all to herself and be able to breed as many mares as she likes. Julie and Charlene agree it was a really dirty trick, but what are you going to do to a guy who's already dying of lung cancer?

Well, murder him. Which someone does.

Obviously this is just a sketch of one element of the story, there would need to be more going on and more characters with other agendas. I'd want to make both Ronnie and Mary Lou essentially sympathetic, though the sort of people Julie can only take in small doses.

Who knows if it'd hang together as more than a sketch, or if I'll still be interested in it when I finish with Kowalski. However, it's fun to think about.

Okay, so my last effort at a horse-related mystery met with limited success. (For a given value of "limited." Some might say "none.") Yesterday, when a member of Wicked Company brought up the idea of a series centred around scams, I remembered an idea I started thinking about a while back. It was a joke, at first, but then I started to think I might actually have something here. At least something worth playing with.

The scam I'm thinking of involves a guy who owns a world champion quarter horse stallion. I haven't decided what event he'll be a world champion in, but the point is the guy is charging big money for stud fees. And then the horse becomes infertile. So the owner decides to shift his breeding operation to exclusively artificial insemination, mostly by cooled transported semen. (This is more than some of you wanted to ever know about the sex lives of horses, isn't it?) He gets himself another stallion and figures he can pass the babies off as by the world champion.

The thing is, the world champ is a grey horse, and grey is dominant so logically you'd expect a certain percentage of the offspring to be grey, no matter the colour of the mare--if the grey gene is passed on, it's expressed. So buddy cleverly gets himself an old grey stud to be the stand-in. Or so he thinks. Grey horses eventually turn white, so he assumes the white-looking stallion is another grey.

He's not. He's a few-spot leopard Appaloosa, one of two App patterns thought to be homozygous--which, as the attached article explains, essentially means that no matter what you breed the few-spot to, you are likely to get wild Appaloosa colour on the baby. So when the expected quarter horse babies turn out to be Appaloosas, there are a lot of very pissed-off mare owners around. Along with the usual sort of people who have other reasons to be mad at such a duplicitous dude. The sleuth will be a boarder/possibly part-time coach at the barn belonging to the nearest mare owner.

Fuck. It has just occurred to me this minute that I think you have to submit DNA typing with your registration application to the American Quarter Horse Association. So he can't have expected to get away with the scam.

Although maybe he just figured he'd have some time to actually get away, before the truth got out, and the App babies forestalled him.

Regardless, I already have the opening lines for the story:

Calista's foal hit the ground shortly after midnight. The shit hit the fan about two minutes later.

Yeah, workable or not, after I finish with Kowalski I have to give this one a try.